Calling all the Heroes…..

Posted on June 7, 2010 by paul

When it comes to film there is nothing better than sheer unadulterated escapism. I want, nay demand, the following: flying people, explosions, cunning stunts and superpowers. Over the last couple of years it seems that the big movie studios are starting to get my none too subtle hints. Comic book movies can be cool. Iron Man worked well. The Dark Knight was epic in scope. I am, and probably always will be, the eternal optimist so I’ve decided to take a look forward at what’s on the horizon when it comes to comic book adaptations.

The Green Lantern

I have high hopes for this. I like Ryan Reynolds and I reckon he can pull off Hal Jordan (oh that just doesn’t sound right now that I’ve typed it). If Ryan happens across this little blog I have but one thing to ask (ok two). Can you reign in the zany about 70% ?. While I’m making demands would like to see Kilowog in the mix as well. Ohh check out this most decent fan art I found on the interwebs.

Deadpool

Gosh it’s that chappie Reynolds again. This time as the merc with the mouth, Deadpool. Again Ryan if your reading this please feel free to go entirely the other way with this one. In fact the more batshit insane the better I think.

Captain America – The First Avenger

I saw The Losers (another comic book inspired movie fact fans) at the weekend and I enjoyed all the performances. Chris Evans did his usual charming goofball shtick. I’ve seen the concept art and he certainly looks the part but again like Reynolds in Green Lantern dial down the sass (good word there from Mrs Cheesecake).

The Avengers

We have much love for Iron Man here at Casa de Cheesecake. Judging by the pics seen so far The Mighty Thor will indeed rock. The Hulk will most likely be back and if rumours are true we’ll see Hawkeye and possibly Ant Man/Giant Man. Throw the First Avenger into the mix and it’s all good. I’m sure Joss Whedon can do the business. I always enjoyed his TV shows, even the ones that were cancelled way to soon.

Actually that reminds me. I was once in Belgium and saw an issue of The Avengers in Flemish. De Vergelders (who knew Marvel published in Flemish. That’s pretty cool.)

Rumour- Monger

There are loads of other adaptations we are likely to see soon as well. More Batman, unlikely it will be The Dark Knight Returns but we can live in hope. More Spiderman, a shame they are going for a reboot I enjoyed Raimi’s take.

One final thought. If anyone out there wants a cracking comic that would make an excellent film you could do a lot worse than Alien Legion. Consider yourself told.

Direct from the Cheesecake Cave

Captain Cheesecake

What makes a film for me…

Posted on May 26, 2010 by paul

The other day I got to thinking. I was wondering about what makes a film special for me. What are the different ingredients that make a movie resonate and ensure I will return for more. I should stress I’m going to jump around in genres here a bit. There is no one film that will contain all these things (at least I don’t think there is?) After some thought I came up with the following list.

a Futile Gesture

Nothing better than a character(s) in a movie laying down their lives for very little point. With a cry of either “You go on without me” or “I’ll hold them off” the plucky sidekick is instantly doomed and royally screwed. Examples: Almost the entire cast of Aliens, Miles Dyson (Terminator 2), Spoon (Dog Soldiers) Ok I admit boxing a werewolf is cool but be honest he was fucked.

Breaking the 4th Wall

Wikipedia defines this as “The presence of the fourth wall is an established convention of fiction and drama, which has led some artists to draw direct attention to it for dramatic or comedic effect. When this boundary is “broken”, for example by an actor onstage speaking to the audience directly, or doing the same through the camera in a film or television program, it is called “breaking the fourth wall”

Mel Brooks is very good at this and he does it all the time, see the example below. Nothing funnier than a glimpse behind the curtain so to speak. Other good examples in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, National Lampoon’s Animal House and The Mask.

time travel / Time machines

Doesn’t matter if it’s Back to The Future, The Time Machine, Primer, Twelve Monkeys or The Time Traveller’s Wife. Messing about with the linear nature of the universe is just epic. I enjoy nothing better than the headfuck that is a good temporal paradox. I saw Hot Tub Time Machine the other day and it dealt with the macguffin that is time travel excellently. It was also great to see Chevy Chase on screen again as I love Fletch. I tried reading the article on Wikipedia about time travel but my head threatened to implode and then explode.

swords

Highlander alone should be reason enough to have this on the list but there are many other splendid films that feature the merry swash and buckle of swords. Kill Bill would not have been half as special if it had been all gun rather than sword play. Other prime examples include Zatoichi, The Sword and the Sorcerer and The Princess Bride.

The Lower Lip wobble

Something that always amuses me, when it really shouldn’t, is when an actor attempts subtle emotion on screen. Some lovely lower lip acting going on in this scene from Jerry Maguire. Fucking hilarious!

an epic finale

I have much love for Who Dares Wins, I’ve discussed it before at some length. One of the reasons is this ten minute sequence toward the end of the film. If your not that interested in watching the whole clip cut to around 9.05 and enjoy the macho hall jogging.

So there you have it. All you Directors out there please take note. All you need do is create a film that has even one of these elements and I’m there. Two or more and I will be your willing slave for life.

Cheerio

A Cinematic Cheesecake

Judging a book by it’s cover

Posted on May 17, 2010 by paul

One of my greatest pleasures in life is getting lost in a good book. I read a lot and enjoy seeking out my next purchase almost as much as the reading itself. Last weekend I shuffled off into town and found myself in my local bookshop with a crisp tenner burning a hole in my pocket.

At this point I’ll pause briefly to explain one thing. I am a creature of habit and tend to stick with authors I know and trust. If I read a title from an author and enjoy it then they can be pretty much guaranteed my continued support for life, what can I say I am nothing if not loyal.

I do, however, occasionally like to dabble in the unknown territory of a NEW AUTHOR – please note when I say new author they could have been around for donkey’s years it’s just that I’ve never read any of their work. I guess I mean a new author to me. (Just so you know.)

After much rummaging and lots of uumms and aahhs I ended up picking up The Age of Zeus by James Lovegrove. Why? Check out the cover below and the answer becomes clear.

It’s got fucking Anthony Hopkins on it! With added lighting coming out his chuffing head. How cool is that? If that’s not enough we have some military types and a helicopter flying near a mountain. Also a review of the author on the back by someone called Saxon Bullock. Saxon Bullock FFS what an absolutely epic name. Cha-ching I’m sold. (On a side note I can’t believe I just wrote cha-ching in a blog. I feel like I’ve just jumped the blogging shark)

I had never realised before how much sway an interesting cover has on my book buying, When I buy anything from an unproven author the cover has got to grab hold of my brain. Here’s another perfect example.

How could you not want to read this. I just oozes mysteriousity. Loving the art deco retro 1920/30s feel and it’s just a little bit creepy. I am so buying this.

Now some of you may consider my new book buying policy a trifle devil may care and I suppose your right. It is entirely possible instead of ending up with an exciting new author to enjoy I purchase something incredibly shit just because I was taken in by the shiny promise of the cover. Well so far so good. I’ll live with the risk. It’s a chance I’m just gonna have to take. That’s the kind of extreme bibliophile I am!

Now ssssshhhhhh! I’m reading

Mr Cheesecake

Undefined Randomness from the Cheesecake of Darkness

Posted on May 10, 2010 by paul

Spies and Vikings

Its been an age since I purchased any new books. My e-reader is pretty full and I am slowly working my way through the backlog. There are however a couple of upcoming titles which I am very keen to get my hands on and will have to go old school a buy paper copies of both.

Mark Chadbourn‘s The Sword of Albion will hit the shelves soon and as I’ve got all his other books it seems likely I’ll buy this one as well. Spies in Elizabethan England – oh yes I think so.

I am also really looking forward to Wolfsangel by MD Lachlan. I’ve heard lots of good things and so will be rushing out to buy once it is released into the wild. Vikings! Yeah I’ll have me some of that. Hmmm when it comes to Vikings you do have to go some to top this though……

Consider the gauntlet well and truly laid down Mr Lachlan, good luck sir! Full Led Zepplin inspired goodness can be located here.

B-Movieathon

Even shite movies deserve some love. When I was a teenager I amassed a vast collection of B-Movies. I went though a phase where the longer or sillier the movie title the more interested I was in viewing it. How could you not love Class of Nuke’Em High Part II: Subhumanoid Meltdown?

Not long ago I realized a lot of the so called ‘mainstream’ stream films I’ve been watching were missing the sense of silly fun that comes with a good B-Movie. I decided it was time to get back in touch with my B-movie roots. I’ve purchased the following from Amazon and I await it’s arrival in the next couple of weeks.

B-Movie
That’s right peoples a 12 disc B-Movie boxed set. Hell Comes to Frogtown, The Stuff (come on who wouldn’t love a film about a rampaging yogurt?) Elvira: Mistress of the Dark, Night of the Living Dead. The list just keeps throwing out gems. Return of the Killer Tomatoes – you have to appreciate the joy of this. People need to know that one of George Clooney‘s first movie roles is about killer fruit.

‘But Pablo’ you cry ‘B-Movies are laughably bad’. You are essentially right but lets not forget the heartwarming story of Mr P Jackson. I’m sure some of you may have seen the Lord of the Rings trilogy but would that exist, or indeed be as good, without the bugnuts insane delights of his earlier work? I demand you go now and seek out Bad Taste, Braindead and Meet the Feebles. Once you’ve viewed all three then we’ll talk.

Gadget Envy

Mrs Cheesecake got a new phone recently. She is not a great fan of touchscreen tech so instead got herself a Crackberry 8900. I have to admit that even though it’s not the smart phone I would buy for myself I do find it quite a neat little bit of techno-wizardry. I still have 12 months to go before I can get a new phone so I must gaze on enviously as she tweets and msgs effortlessly.

Till next time. Don’t you go changin.

Cheesecake Out

Centurion

Posted on April 25, 2010 by paul

Before I start I have to admit there may be certain amount of bias in this blog.I have much love for Neil Marshall’s films.

Dog Soldiers was a brilliant werewolf flick. Loads of lovely nice dark humour. My brother-in-law, who is in the army, confirmed that the banter and actions of the squaddies were very realistic and well observed. Obviously with the exception of the fighting werewolves bit.

The Descent managed to scare the crap out of me and pisses on The Cave (which came out around the same time). Never seen night vision used more effectively for a scare before or since.

Doomsday is like the bastard son of Mad Max and is a hell of a lot of fun. It was nice to see Glasgow and particularly George Square/Queen St Station get trashed.

Today I sat down and watched Centurion. The story of the legendary Ninth Roman legion and how they went to the north of Britain to take out the Picts. As far as historic records are concerned the Ninth just disappeared without a trace. No one knows what really happened to them. Marshall has used this gap in the history books as the basis for the film.

Lots of familiar faces here. Michael Fassbender, Dominic West, Liam Cunningham, Noel Clarke and David Morrisey. Lots of violence as well. Blood and guts all over the place. Picts vs Romans makes for multiple beheadings.

I loved it all. The action was first rate. The scenery was stunning and the pace was just right. One for the blu-ray collection when available I think.

I read the other day that Neil Marshall will be directing a new version of The Professionals. To wet your appetite here is my first foray into the world of You Tube. Enjoy!

Now that I have started fannying around with Windows Movie Maker fuck knows what will appear on Ya Toob next. Perhaps something special for the two year anniversary of the blog?

Valete

Pablus Cheesecakeius

Tele-visual Shite, Haribo & Volcanoes

Posted on April 18, 2010 by paul

Random things that have caught my attention this week….

tv shite

Disappointed to discover that Auntie Beeb has pulled the plug on Survivors. It seems yet again that genre TV has had another kick in the teeth. The thing that annoys me most is that the second series ended on a fucking cliffhanger of all things.

Sci-Fi has become SyFy. God that makes me feel unclean just typing it. Some smart arse exec somewhere has decided that a perfectly acceptable channel name wasn’t sexy enough so a rebrand was in order. C’mon though SyFy. Sounds a bit wanky don’t you think. I’ve also noticed that they seem to be moving away from just sci-fi programming. In the US of States they have started showing wrestling. FFS I don’t have a problem with wrestling but on a science fiction channel?

On the plus side the new series of V started, after only 4 months of delay. Some of us did spot you were advertising it for January SyFy! No Marc Singer or Michael Ironside though.

haribo

I went to the cinema yesterday. I saw Cemetery Junction. Much as I wanted to not enjoy it (Gervais gets on my tits a bit) I couldn’t. It’s a good film and I would recommend you go see it. Perfectly captures the 70s. Breaking from tradition I purchased a bag of Haribo.While I was waiting for the film to start I read the ingredients. Have you ever read the ingredients on a packet of Haribo? Well have you? Some of the highlights include – beeswax, hibiscus and nettle. I kid you not. I still crave them mind you.

volcanoes

Eyjafjallajökull in Iceland erupted this week and has thrown air travel in Europe into utter chaos. Just goes to show that nature is ever unpredictable. I sort of like that. Should make us all more aware that we are but passengers on this little planet. That and volcanoes look really cool.

Till next time

Pyroclastic Cheesecake bids you farewell.

Gadget Show Live

Posted on April 11, 2010 by paul

I’m a gadget head. I love all tech, hardware, software and gadge. Last year I found out about the Gadget Show Live about a week before the event happened. Needless to say by that point the event was well and truly sold out so there was no point in even trying to attend. This year I was ahead of the game and got my tickets sharpish.

I’ve never been to the NEC before. In fact I’ve only ever been to Birmingham once and that was another lifetime ago. The place is like it’s own little city. It is fucking enormous. I reckon it took us about twenty minutes to walk from the the station to the hall where the show was taking place.

One of the first things we saw were these immense statues. On a side note does anyone have £3000 I can borrow? On the understanding you’ll never get it back.

Mrs Cheesecake and I had also purchased tickets to see the Supershow hosted by the Gadget Show’s very own Jason Bradbury, Suzi Perry, Ortis Deeley and John Bentley.

The Supershow was fantastic (it did help we were 3rd row from the front so got an amazing view). There were some great tech related challenges and the crowd were kept involved with all the goings on. We also managed to get a bit wet!

After the show we wandered around the exhibition. The one drawback to the whole thing I suppose was that it was INCREDIBLY busy. The crowds were everywhere. This did make it difficult to stop and actually view anything without either getting in someone’s way or someone getting in your way.
On our way out we ran into the 10th Doctor and friends. Damn Daleks get everywhere don’t they.

Pablo Cheesecake Kicks Ass

Posted on April 6, 2010 by paul

My final movie blog of the Easter weekend is Kick Ass. Someone on the interweb said that the Daily Mail would shit kittens over this one and I can see why. The film contains da da da “Adult Content”. You heard correctly folks there is violence,swearing, self abuse and self tan. They even use the c-word. I spotted it, more than once in fact, I am shocked to report that the word comics is mentioned.

All joking aside I wasn’t sure what to expect from this. I have enjoyed all of Matthew Vaughn’s previous films but comic books are very close to my heart and I was a little worried. It is fair to say that I feel this way about every comic book adaption that makes it’s way to the big screen and will continue to do so. (I’m looking at you Green Lantern, Thor, Iron Man 2 etc).

My worries appear to have been groundless. The film worked pretty well and the changes to the story made the characters seem a bit more fun. Those who have read the comic know that the hero doesn’t get the girl. He does in the movie version. Oh shit spoiler alert! Damn sorry. Oh come on your only going to see the film if you know the book anyway aren’t you?

The cast were all good. I think Mark Strong and Chloe Moretz were exceptional.

Yes the film is violent. Yes the subject matter is undeniably silly but fuck it it’s only a movie.

Now where’s my lycra leotard? (if you knew me you would realise just how horrific a mental picture this actually is)

Captain Cheesecake

Clash of the Cheesecake

Posted on April 6, 2010 by paul

This Easter weekend we’ve managed 3 films. We saw How to Try your Dragon. See my 5 year old nephew’s review here. After he left we decided next on the list was the remake, re-envisioning, rebirth of Clash of the TItans.

What did I think. Well the film was pretty good. It all looked epic. Ancient Greece was all sandals and togas. Mt Olympus was armour and shininess.

I did have a couple of problems with the film though. Firstly the 3D was wholly unnecessary. I don’t actually recall any point where it enhanced my viewing pleasure. I believe the film wasn’t originally meant to be 3D and it was added as an afterthought. I just think it was a bit pointless. I am willing to accept that 3D is meant to be subtle but this was just done badly. Which is a shame.

My other issue – Sam Worthington’s hair. What the fuck is up with that. To a man every other male on screen had long hair and most of them had beards. Ancient Greece = Metallic audience. That’s all good but then along comes Sam with the feckin buzz cut. How in the blue hell did he manage that? Are there ancient magical hair trimmers that have been handed down to Perseus as a gift from the Gods? Part of me actually hopes that there is footage of him wearing a long haired wig that is so bad members of the film crew are rolling about on the floor pissing themselves. Now don’t get me wrong Mr Worthington rocks the buzz cut but Perseus does not. Check out Harry Hamlin to see how it should be done.
The supporting cast were all good. I particularly enjoyed Mads Mikkelsen and Liam Cunningham.

In summary then the film was ok but Sam Worthington’s anachronistic hair detracted from my enjoyment.

In fact I’m so angry now…….Release the Cheesecake!

How to Train Your Pablo Cheesecake

Posted on April 4, 2010 by paul

Yesterday Mrs Cheesecake and I had the pleasure of taking our 5 year old nephew, Nico (Unarmed and Dangerous), on his first trip to the cinema. We went to see How to Train Your Dragon in 3D. I told him that I would let him post a review on the internet of what he thought. See below for N(U&D)s insightful review. Not only that but his opinions of cinema in general.

His first reaction to the cinema was that he very much liked the giant television. When I asked him about the story of the film I got following response

“I did like the black dragon he was my favourite”. As I said insightful.

Turns out that 5 year-olds don’t really think much of the 3D experience either. He lasted about twenty minutes before the glasses came off.

I also don’t think he was that bothered that the vast majority of ancient Vikings sounded suspiciously Scottish. Though he did claim later on that when he blows up the world we will all have to move to Scotland? and learn to speak Scottish.

Later

Toothless Cheesecake

PS I enjoyed the film but have no plans to blow up the world. The animation was great and I liked the characterisation of the Vikings and the dragons. Also I would quite like a beard like the head Viking had (To my knowledge the dragons had no facial hair)

Pablo Cheesecake

A Mid-Life Crisis Waiting to Happen…

Author Archives: paul