Tag Archives: Jason Flemyng

A Cinematic Deathmatch…

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Yesterday I went to the cinema with Mrs Cheesecake, as is our want on a typical Saturday afternoon. Actually if you have ever read my blog before then this fact will come as very little surprise.

We saw the new James Purejoy flick, Ironclad. (I should stress I didn’t come up with the nickname Purejoy that was Mrs Cheesecake and her interweb chums.)

I enjoyed the film immensely you should check it out, but that is an aside.

I spotted Jason Flemyng playing a character called Beckett. Think medieval mercenary type and you’ll be on the right lines. *SPOILER* He dies *END SPOILER* After the film a thought popped into my brain, I freely admit this doesn’t happen often. Jason Flemyng seems to die in everything he appears in. Now I admit I haven’t seen his entire back catalogue but it appears just about everything I have watched, that he is in, he bites the bullet.

Behold the evidence

  • Deep Rising – Tentacled to death
  • Stardust – Taken out by ambitious sibling.
  • Solomon Kane – Dispatched by “The Purejoy”. It’s nice to see they made up in Ironclad.
  • Clash of the Titans – Removed from existence by “The Worthington” and he gets his hand chopped off and mutated beyond all recognition before that. Poor bastard.
  • Ironclad – Oh go and see the film for goodness sake!

Jason is basically fucked....again

Who else, I thought, suffers such cinematic bad luck? After sitting around for a bit scratching my head I remembered. Poor old Michelle Rodriguez.

  • Resident Evil – Milla Jovovich is the main female lead. Michelle didn’t stand a chance.
  • Bloodrayne – I’ve seen this but as it is a Uwe Boll film I am required by law to never speak of it again.
  • Fast & Furious – Well she lasted till the fourth film of the franchise. That’s not bad.
  • Lost – They are all already dead anyway so I’m not sure if this counts. (oh sorry *SPOILERS*)
  • Avatar- Even working with James Cameron can’t save you Michelle!

You don't look well love

I reckon it’s about time Jason and Michelle were given a fair shake of the stick. Lets make a film where they get to cut about and dispatch the bad guys and neither of them die?

Oh suit yourself. It was just a thought.

Solomon Kane – a Cheesecake’s view

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Recently I was in London and as part of the trip had the opportunity to meet James Purefoy. He’s terribly good looking, impossibly dashing and, according to Mrs Cheesecake and friends, should be renamed James Purejoy. You can read about my escapades here.

After my return from that there London I finally got the opportunity to go see his latest film – Solomon Kane. Based on the stories written by Robert E Howard the film is a tale of a man seeking redemption. Set in an a muddy 17th century England Kane is at the outset essentially a scumbag. He kills, maims and destroys whatever he can. He cares for nothing but himself.  Shockingly for such a nice chap a minion of Beelzebub turns up and explains that his soul is now damned and the Devil wants to collect. From this point on Kane tries to walk a peaceful path. He turns his back on his evil ways and tries to lead a good life. Needless to safe El Diablo is not such a push over and Kane is forced to face his demons (literally and metaphorically).

Purefoy being all smoldery

Somewhere on the net some person much wittier than I described Solomon Kane as a West Country Batman. I can see what they are getting at. The story fair smacks of Troubled Avenger. Not that this is a bad thing. Purefoy always manages to make Kane look pained when he has to resort to violence. Here is a man that wants nothing but peace but can’t escape his past.

As an aside the following thought did occur to me. How old is Max Von Sydow? He seems to have made a career out of playing old men (with the exception on Ming and the Brewmeister Smith from Strange Brew. Actually if you haven’t seen Strange Brew seek if out. Very odd and very funny).

Solomon Kane looks great. Its is meant to be all grungy and dark and it succeeds in spades. I think I would have liked to have seen a bit more of Jason Flemyng‘s character. He plays the main villain of the piece and i think he deserved a bit more screen time.

A more artistic rendering...

The end of the film is left wide open for a sequel and I think I would probably seek it out should one be made. Only if the following scene is used mind you. I apologise in advance to fans of Batman (1989)

[Solomon Kane dangles a thug over the side of a building]
Thug : Don’t kill me! Don’t kill me, man! Don’t kill me! Don’t kill me, man!
Solomon Kane: I’m not going to kill you. I want you to do me a favor. I want you to tell all your friends about me.
Thug : What are you?
Solomon Kane : I’m Solomon Kane. All right my lover.

Till next time

Solomon Cheesecake

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